3/30 things: parents

i LOOOOOOVE my parents. 

it wasn't always this way though. i remember when i was 14 i was willing to do anything just to piss my parents off. and looking back, i'm not quite sure why. 

but as i've gotten older, i see a method to all the madness. 

my mom is amazing. she is sort of more like my friend than a mom. i joke around with her and do weird things, like dance in my underwear, when it's just us. she always looks at me and just gives me this look that says "oh God..where did i go wrong?" when we fight, all hell breaks loose. i guess it's one of those things that come with being mexican. we yell. i love my momma so much though. 

my pops is one cool cat. i've always been a little scared of him. mostly when he's mad. oh boy...when he's mad, his looks alone make me cry. but being daddy's little girl has it's perks. he's not always willing to hear me out but when we agree, it's quite grand. my dad is the kind of person who doesn't show affection all that much. so it's hard to know when he's happy. usually, during my sparring matches i've heard he's one of my loudest cheerleaders. but i'm a little busy...so i never notice really. but despite everything, he's always been willing to support me in everything that we both agree on. 

these two are incredible. there are so many attributes that i want to take from their parenting skills when i raise my own kiddos. i couldn't ask for better parents. 

2/30 things:fears

i'm deathly afraid of spiders. 

i don't really know where this fear came from but i've always found them to be gross. when i was in preschool, this girl i still know to this day, was playing with a daddy long leg. it was crawling up and down her legs and she'd hold it and ew. it was just so gross to me. then, we lived in this ghetto apartment when i was little, and spiders all over the place. i'd wake up with spider bites all over my legs and one time my face. i was petrified. they're just so gross and it makes me want to cry. i am willing to call of a wedding even, if the guy i chose to marry won't squish my spiders. it's not something huge, but to me, it means the world and a half.

rejection. i think that to some extent everyone has this fear. not everyone is 100 percent comfortable with themselves 100 percent of the time.
i've seen how devastating rejection can be on someone. so whenever i feel like it could happen, i get out of the situation as fast as possible. that might be why i never last very long in relationships. i'm scared of letting someone know every detail about me then have them leave. i think that's why i tend to close off or just not even open up. it's easier to for me to move on knowing there was so much of me they didn't know, i didn't share anything too personal. it doesn't matter how long a relationship is, i've been in one with myself for so much longer. at the end of the day if i don't look after myself, who will? but it's nice to know that there are genuinely nice people around.

regret. i don't want to look back when i'm old and realize i had a life full of "what if's" i want to be able to look back and have tons of stories from all the adventures i went on and all the cool people i met. i remember one time that i felt regret at it's fullest. it was on the way back from a run, i was pacing with varsity and we were back to the school by now. we were crossing the fields, and i was exhausted. so i fell back and finished with the jv girls. i was so mad at myself. i was so close. and i didn't finish. i know it's not a huge thing to regret, but the feeling afterwards makes me never want to regret anything much larger ever.

30 things: 20 random facts about myself

1. i love taylor swift 

2. i am a strong believer in karma

3. getting letters in the mail is super exciting

4. nail polish and bubble baths will fix just about anything

5. i am a registered voter of this united state

6. i have 4 wisdom teeth.. i knew i was wise for a reason

7. i think i would be a cat lady if i wasn't allergic to them..so i guess i'll be a china doll lady or maybe even married..

8. running in cold weather makes me happy

9. before i sparr, i like to eat costa

10. third grade was brutal 

11. in preschool, brian something called me Dumbo

12. i love blog stalking

13. i have 3 very obvious best friends and i love them all 

14. i'm a little freaked out about dying. i don't want to look back and see all the opportunities i missed or people i hurt 

15. if i could pick any era to live in, i'd say the 20's. strictly based off style.

16. when my runs are longer than an hour, something's wrong

17. i like cleaning..

18. i no longer have a  "I wonder what it would be like if i ever saw them again" list

19. i finally joined the colored jeans trend

20. i like book stores. i could go into debt to barns and noble