as junior year winds down, i can say that i've never been more excited and ready for summer.
i'm done with the late nights of homework, and crazy uptight teachers.
last week was my personal hell week.
yeah. i procrastinate like none other and i felt it's full effects all weekend.
it started out like this..
yay monday! it's gonna be a busy, yet PRODUCTIVE week:)
wednesday...
i'm late, and sweats and pony tails are good.
no one to impress. it's only high school right?
and by friday..
it looks like this. only with pants and not an oversized shirt attempting to pass for a dress. it's some pathetic attempt at getting ready. then deciding that the sweatshirt in my running locker looks better then anything i tried pulling off that morning before i left for my 1233 frap that week.
by now, i've made friends with the coffee boy at juice n java, the girl at starbucks, and the boys at nordstrom cafe. my bed is angry with me and needs some one on one time. and my closet thinks i've been kidnapped because they've been abandoned for an entire week. and my pj shelf thinks it's been a week long sleepover, cause it's empty by now...
and that my friends, is hell week.
my summer will consist of early morning yoga, cross country running, seven peaks, summer concerts, and taekwondo.
with all this hectic-ness going on, it suddenly hit me last night, at girls night with emily murdocko, that in a years time, everything is going to be even more hectic then it is now.
COLLEGE.
moving out.
COLLEGE.
graduation.
COLLEGE.
tuition..
COLLEGE.
did i mention college is in a years time???
i guess whoever said that change is the only thing that's constant, totally knew that they were talking about.
but what's more crazy is that applications for everything is coming up..
like school....
scholarships...
and whatever else.
like where you go to college determines A LOT about the rest of your life i think,
like, what job you get, what you major in, who you meet, what sports teams you cheer for, the stickers on your car, the sweatshirt you'll get, ahhh:(
and i have some HUGE decisions that need to be decided pronto..
like if i'm running in college,
in state vs out of state,
abroad, or america,
BYU, the U, Oregon, Washington, Boston or New York..
then it hit me.
i'm not ready.
i don't know how to do ANYTHING on my own..
like cooking, checking the oil in my car, let alone changing a tire, balancing a check book, all those little things, yeah, clueless right here.
yet.
so i've come up with a plan of attack,
the u..:)
while i learn to be independent, i wanna stay close to home kinda.
just far enough away that i can have my own life, but close enough that i can come home in 40 minutes:)
baby steps :)
but if i get accepted out of state, i'm jumping head first into this whole independent thing:)
i think it's time that i learn what i'm really made of. i'm almost 18, and almost at the end of my public education career. it's time for me and my parents to see how they've done.
i love them so so so much. and for the most part, i wouldn't change anything. but i feel like our relationship would be so much better, if there was that distance there. so when i came home, i'd wanna be here, not dreading it. when i'd call, i'd wanna talk to them, not avoiding texts.
i think they've done a killer job thus far actually:)
i have pretty good grades,
i'm graduating with extra credits,
i haven't gotten wasted or high in high school,
i'm not pregnant or STD ridden,
i have a varsity letter in cross, and a few state championships under my belt,
i floss diligently.
so on and so forth. i think that in a years time, it'll be time to see how this little one (who's not so little anymore...) holds up in the real world:)
DAY 17: (one day...i'll get to 31...)
another picture of yourself..
yes. life is good <3
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