today when i was vacuuming and rocking out to my ipod i started thinking about taekwondo. the state tourney to be exact. pretty much it was horrible. i have never been to any other tourney that was such a mess. it made me want to punch walls and cry. in fact at one point in the day, i did. and i wasn't alone. but the photographer there got some pretty sweet shots.
the day started with me, my mom and my sister trying to find the venue.. being us, we got lost and showed up with like 5 minutes to get me registered. good thing there was like 400 kids waiting for the same thing. BUT my dearest coach rob:) (i love that man) as soon as i showed up, he took me straight to the front of the line and i was set. yay for having amazing coaches.
competition started out with forms. the bane of my existence in taekwondo.. they're stupid. and the fact that the US made a forms team is stupid times 7. forms are an imaginary fight.. FIGHT being the key word.. but whatever. that division was stupid anyways. and i'm not just saying that because i didn't place. i'm saying that because it was. i did the best forms of my life and stuck all my kicks and even trained weeks with someone who has amazing forms. she's on the national forms team... (it's a team for all those who fail at fighting...) and i didn't place... what the heck... i knew it was mainly because of who my coach was. sorry my coach was just that amazing you ( the utah state taekwondo committee or whatever. they're not really even all that important) felt the need to rip him off.. and even britt, she has amazing forms.. even on an off day, didn't place. but the girl who got first did deserve it. about half way through, britt and i knew we weren't gonna place, so we had fun:) two boys on our team came over..and gave us gum in the middle of the division... i even got a neck rub:)
that was horrid. at any other toureny with the slightest sense of organization, i'm pretty sure we would have been DQ-ed.
then sometime in between our forms divison, and sparring, the love of my live at the time was doing his forms.. and let's be honest. this kid is AMAZING at forms. i used to be the one with the pretty feet and everything. best kicks..best forms. then along came this kid.. and i was second. i'm not a second kinda person. the entire year i was there, i tried so hard to out do him. i don't think i ever managed that, but i knew there were times when i was just as good as him, so a tie is better then second. anyways, then he fought first and he did pretty well. the kid he fought was like a national champ in sparring. kinda the real deal. but britt and i watched then entire thing.. flinching whenever he got hit. there were a few hours before i sparred.. and somewhere in that, my mom left to go pick up my dad. and when she left, i went into the hall and about started to cry. for some reason, disappointing my dad has always been one of the worst fears i have in life. it usually gets the best of me. especially in sparring. cause, for me, stepping into the arena, feeling the mat under my toes, and all the straps from my gear feels oddly at home. it's what i live for. and the look on my dad's face when i do score and win is priceless. and i really wanted him there at state. i wanted him to watch first hand me taking my title. i didn't wanna recap the moment. i wanted him there in person. right when i thought i had everything in check, the one kid came out and asked if i was okay.. and in the same moment that i said yes, i ran into his arms and cried for a good 5 minutes.. and somehow, it all was okay..then somewhere in that i had to gear up and fight. luckily, my dad made it back. right when i got called back, they all came through the door.
it was game time. i found out who i was fighting before i even got anything on. because the girl who i was supposed ti fight bailed, i got the light-middle title, and i was fighting for the light heavy title. good thing i was 128 pounds and she was like 145... but because of who she was, i was going to win. i had to. everything, bragging rights, pride, the title, everything was up for grabs. and they were mine. the only thing getting in my way was my knee. i still to this day have to have surgery on it, but with a little tape, all is cured. i remeber coming back into the corner after the first round, and Rob saying "why aren't you kicking??" and i glared was said "my kneee.." and he said "you have to legs" and then the timer went off. and i won. i got pushed around, lost a point for being shoved out of the ring, and got punched in the face. with all odds against me, and clearly a fixed fight, i won. it was my title. my best friend was there. the love of my life was there. my coach smiled at me. and my entire family was there too. perfection.
AND all this comes from me cleaning and rocking out to jenn blossil.. clearly, there is something in my head mashing thoughts into each other and bringing up things like these.. kjahdfkljsfhlks
and the only reason i post this, is cause he won't ever read it :) and i needed a post for the day too haha
No comments:
Post a Comment